Here’s the thing. I want to write about how my desire to create art has turned into a minor obsession. But the first thing that crossed my mind is that I shouldn’t have a blog post without a photo of something I’ve created. And I can’t seem to create anything today because my little obsession has led to paralysis.
Where did that come from?
Last December I wrote out a bucket list — NOT a list of resolutions — a list of things I really wanted to try in 2014. One of the things on the list was to take a painting course or mixed media workshop. The reason why that particular item was on the bucket list was because I kept telling myself that I could. not. paint. I don’t know how I came to believe that since I had never really tried. And it was something that I had always wanted to do. So I tried. I took an online workshop in mixed media painting. Then I took another in art journaling, and another on watercolor painting, and another and another. Some were free, some cost me some shekels. And all came with a list of needed art supplies.
All of a sudden I am in several workshops or art-related groups, each with challenges, tutorials, courses. All of a sudden it is too much. I can’t keep up with all of it. And yet I feel almost compelled to take more workshops, different workshops. I want to know how to do it all! It’s as if too much is not enough. Really. And the result is that I am feeling paralyzed again. I don’t know where to start. Where to stop.
So I am telling on myself. I know of obsessions, of compulsions. I might cross the line a little bit before I recognize it but I do know when enough is enough. So today I decided that I would focus on two groups/workshops for the rest of the year and I will let the others go for now. And, until the end of this year, I will use the art supplies I already have unless I run out of something that I use frequently (i.e. paper, pens, etc.).
Too much is too much. Enough is enough. The end.